2008年06月28日
Walk on People's Left Side
Have stayed here for a few days, not as beautiful as what they have described either. On the contrary, the life rapid rhythm of this city makes me unable to suit. And the battle field of a survival of the fittest. There is no human touch that is its advantage, the murderous intention is the winning of it step by step. Everyone here is only another person's transient guest hurriedly. Each place is not only starting point but also the terminal point. I do not know it is these that bring about an advance in economy, feasible and such economic development. Anyway here does not need the weak. But I think the weak have the weak's existence power! And whom I acted is a weak person.
Guangzhou very hot summer, rain very urgent, afford to come each time. My mood is like this rain too sometimes, the baffled one is glad sentimentally and baffledly. I am not a person apt to change, but life always can make people change. We must sacrifice some sometimes, could get. Give up the bottom line, change the thought, reality is so cruel and dull.
Walk in the city not belonging to oneself, is looking at this sky not belonging to oneself, the mood is ignorant and worries about Chang. It seems that oneself is really only a surplus person in this city. Everybody's happy laughters and cheerful voices will not hold me, everybody's stories all have nothing to do with me. They do thing of them just, they can stop step come, watch nearby sadness of people. Look at pale yellow light, mood at the street just like that lonely. The light took the picture in eyes, it was the scene cut apart incoherently by the eye that was seen. The letter is in disorder by the step, I keep straight on, I have wanted to go down like this all the time. Move towards the brightness under the light from the shade of the street lamp, and then move towards the shade.
I like taking the bus, like going to every station to see others getting on the bus and getting off, the person getting on the bus brings a section of stories, get off and take the story away again. They I transient guest of life, whom I can exert all one's effort very much see them before they get off each time, want to carve their face in the brain, because can not see again after getting off. Sometimes I think every face is very familiar with, every face should appear before my eyes, because see, just think in this way.
I have not said, how is the result, just the love offers as a gift and leaves strange White Cloud Airport. I publicize, how it is in future, set out and hover again at runway to cover the snow. Listen to, go through Na sing the song, always can sew with large stitches, get up I a limitless one forgotten, voice that rustle with sad to spread soul to enter me in mid-night each time, each note lets my soul tremble, each tremble lets the deepest emotion of my bottom of heart be sad again. The taking off and landing of the plane, is all taking others' story and ideal and reaching their destination. The person that perhaps had just took off, but they will reach the place where they wanted to go finally. And I, when can take off? Is my future kind? Can send out and hover again in covering the runway of the snow too? I dare, face, because I walk on people's left side, walk very tiredly, but can't stop. The sad road, I drive in the wrong direction. I choose to roam about, because want to escape. Roaming about can let me needn't face too much reality and social pressure, the walking that can make me sad, the dreary one dies.
I inspect one's own sorrow in one's own characters, shoo away the strong beginning, sad end.
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